every day I wake up and look outside the patio... I see.. I feel... I comprehend the changes happening around me... I read the news... and though I understand what I am reading... none of it makes sense... the actions people take... the hypocrisy involved... the pursuit of self interest.... maybe I am just too detached from reality I would understand why i feel so helpless.... I look and I see the past.. the present and the future... not by means of clairvoyance.... but by means of analysis and understanding of patterns and events..... it surprises me that I am one of few who see and recognise these patterns.. but then again this is the cures of being a dyslexic.. to always have the capacity to see.. hear.. sense and understand things that others cannot..... this is not arrogance.... because I would be hard pressed to admit that there is much that others see.. hear.. sense and understand that I may never do.... even if i experience these events from their own perspective.... in any event... feel as though both forms of existence do not make sense what so ever..... slowly I begin to understand that conmen sense is not as common as we are led to believe... and that it is a rather relative mater....
I think fear of the unknown is the greatest obstacle that I, as a human, must face.... I have such a thirst for knowledge and what I don't know I like to investigate and discover.... I think I am frightened by the prospect that as I grow older.... i know that there will be more and more that I can no longer comprehend... or understand and make known.... that prospect frightens me though I should resign myself to the fact that much of the unknown will remain so.... no matter how hard I try to comprehend the inevitability of change
